you need look no further than our driveway...

our Christmas morning was spent in happy oblivion, sharing gifts and opening stockings, reading Luke 2 and drinking coffee. (Starbucks and otherwise)

little did we know the priceless and precious gift that we were about to be given.

while traveling south to visit family, G, M and N were involved in a serious truck accident.

there were two water tankers traveling north. after failing to negotiate an "S" curve, G's truck slammed into the second water tanker.

it was the quick thinking of those two drivers who quite literally saved the lives of my children: Miriam Elizabeth, Nathaniel Joseph and Gabriel Donald.


G would have hit that tanker head on, except for the fact that the first driver radioed back to the second that the purple pickup was loosing control. the second driver took his foot off the gas, and got all the way over to the right, against the guardrail.




even still, the front axle of the (full) water tanker was broken, although the water tanker was rated for 28,000 pounds. the tanker driver sustained a broken wrist in his frantic effort to avoid hitting the pickup truck.

G was the most seriously injured of the 3, with a shattered pelvis and broken hip. he also had severe lung contusions, and was in the hospital for 5+ days, 1 of those in ICU.


the kids left the house around 1PM. the accident was reported at 1:26. i received a call from the hospital at 2:37.

in those brief moments, while Dave and i were settling in for a quiet Christmas afternoon, God was watching over my children.

yet again, God has shown his abundant, unfathomable and unending mercies for my family.

i cannot even begin to imagine the horror and sorrow that we were spared from on Christmas day.

G has a second chance at life- the chance to seek and discern what it is that God has spared him for. surely God has plans for G- something that only my youngest son can do.

but most importantly- we have our 3 children- healthy and safe. and a visible reminder:

God is a God of inches.

and He loves us all.

you need look no further than our driveway to see that.

so you say you'd like to have some children?

Okay, but try this first!

*Go to bed, get all comfy and warm….have the fire alarm go off unpredictably all night. Repeat this every night for at least 17 years.

*Take a bucket full of vomit and dump it in the back seat of your car, on your couch, all over your carpets, splash it down the front of your clothes and then put a few drops in the toilette.

*Take another bucket of vomit and soak all the bedding, towels, your clothes, your neighbor’s clothes and the cat in it until you have enough laundry to fill the entire house and keep you washing until the the next round of vomit…which will occur right after you make up all the beds with clean sheets.

*Okay, now you’re going to need some urine….put it in a spray bottle and have fun.

*Grab a couple of puppies, set them loose in your living room…leave the house for a few days.They will simulate what a couple of kids can do to a room in a few minutes.

*Take a few of your precious collectibles and smash them to bits.

*Stain all your shirts with blood, paint, boogers…whatever is in the fridge.

*Cut a tiny hole in your curtains.

*Get a permanent marker…get to coloring! Walls, floors, furniture, the entire world is your canvas.

*Buy all the Lego’s you can find in the world along with Matchbox cars, Barbie shoes, hair bows, tiny socks, candy wrappers, McDonald’s french fries, Goldfish crackers, Crayons and crushed granola bars: mix up in a tub and freely sprinkle the contents in your vehicle, garage, yard, under your bed, in your bed, under the cushions of your couch and every corner in your house….make sure you stand over floor vents and drop handfuls.

*Have a friend hide your shoes, all of them. Wait until you’re ready to go to an important event to try to find them.

*Go on a long trip with a very loud and emotional person who will talk and cry and scream for the entire trip except for the quick nap they took right before you had to pull over to get gas…which caused them to wake up and be extremely irritable.

*When you stop to eat at a nice restaurant your travel companion tells you they forgot their shoes.

*Find a store to buy them some shoes.

*They will lose those shoes at some point during the trip and you will buy them three more pairs of shoes that are so ugly and cheap that you’re embarrassed to be with the person.

*They never lose the ugly shoes, they wear them everyday much to your dismay.

*Have someone call you to tell you they forgot their lunch at least three or four times a week.

*Put a sparkly unicorn sticker on the rear of your jeans and wear them in public all day.

*Take something sharp and scratch the crap out of your vehicle.

*Throw away three billion 5 dollar bills because that is what your children will need for this thing and that event and blah, blah, blah.

*Say the following every single day, “Put your shoes away. Pick up your jacket. Eat your dinner. Pick up your toys. Flush the toilette. Be nice to your brother. Stop talking. Listen to me. Be quiet. STOP! NO! We’ll see. Maybe. Go get your shoes. Find your shoes. Where are your shoes. Why? Go ask your father. STOP IT! I said NO! What did Mommy say?” add a please and thank you occasionally until you realize it’s just a waste of your breath.

*Load and unload the dishwasher at least three times a day.

*Buy enough groceries to last a month, take them home. Invite a teenager to come over and help himself to any food in the house.

*Go back to the grocery store…invite teenager….go back to the grocery store…invite teenager….

*Yell at a wall that it needs to get its room cleaned, wait for a response. Yell some more. Walk away defeated that the wall will never clean its room.

*Hope that the wall will move out of your house someday and have twenty of their own walls that never do anything you ask them to do.

If you can smile at the end of all of this…go start a family.

i don't claim to have written this funny (but too true) list. it was written by April, one of my favorite bloggers.

but if you think this was funny, wait till you read about her recipe to make sour cherry crumb pie!

it's just not the same without them

last weekend we packed up the van again and drove over 700 miles south, stopping at Bob Jones University in South Carolina. in addition to M returning to college as a sophomore, we also took N as a freshman in the class of 2013, majoring in chemistry.

it's a comfort to me to have them both there at the same place, but BJU is so far away!

parts of this year have been very difficult, especially after our oldest son left home last October. i treasured all the more the time that we had as a family, realizing that it's all too fleeting. it seems like it was just yesterday that i had my first baby girl, M, and already it's over 20 years later and my children are growing up!



this big old house seems strangely silent without M and N. i find myself glancing at the clock to see how soon either of them might be home. i find myself leaving the back porch light on for M, since she always worked 2nd shift and came home after dark. i catch myself wondering if N will bring home coffee or (and?!) donuts when he gets off work at Dunkin' Donuts.


there are still 3 children here at home with us, and a long way to go before we have an empty nest. but still, after 20+ years of mothering, i find that i wasn't quite ready to be done.



did i miss something? did i teach them all that they needed to know? did i forget something gigantic and really important?


do they know not to mix the lights and darks? not to wash something red in hot water? when to put the fabric softener in? are they organized enough? will the homework, reading and assignments all be done on time? do they know what a dangling participle is? (do i even know what a dangling participle is?) do they remember the difference between their, they're and there? will they eat right and not drink too much coffee? take their contacts out every night? wear sensible shoes? listen to the weather report before getting dressed?


i could talk myself into dashing down to South Carolina to give them that final list of Really Important Stuff That I May Have Forgotten To Mention.


But don't worry~ i won't do that. because i know that in spite of all my parental flaws and imperfections they are going to turn out just fine. along the way we may have missed a few important tidbits about prepositions or ancient Greek history, but i think that M and N have learned the Really Important Lessons Of Life.


Love God with all their soul.


Serve Him with all their might.


Seek Him with all their heart.


they had a good foundation, and now they are ready and eager to build their own house.

and i, for one, will be their greatest fan and cheerleader.


because I'm so proud of them both!

through the eyes of a child...

this Christmas is especially full of wonder and anticipation because we have all been blessed with the privilege of seeing the birth of The Baby through the eyes of a child.

i am a collector of nativity scenes, and have many that have special meaning to me. but, i also have several sets that are just for the children to play with- so they can act out the story in their playtime, making Jesus' birthday all the more understandable. early this month i retrieved from the attic one of our most durable nativity sets, and sat down with A to tell her the story- starting with the angel Gabriel's startling news to Mary, ending with the arrival of the Wise Men, and the 3 presents they brought to the Baby. A listened to the story with rapt attention, and wanted to hold the baby Jesus, and even wrapped Him in a tissue so He would be "toasty warm." while i don't expect A to comprehend, or even remember the whole story, i wanted to help her begin to understand why we celebrate Christmas. i want it to be real to her.

the little girls and i were asked to participate in our church's Christmas play. the girls and i went up on stage to see the baby Jesus, and Mary and Joseph, and were to say a little poem and finger play to the new baby.

at our first rehearsal, A was enthralled and captivated. the look on her face is one that i will never forget. she was filled with wonder and awe- to her this was the baby Jesus, and she was allowed to hold Him! she held the baby doll, and i could hear her murmuring to him. she caressed his head, and kissed his face, gently making sure he was covered with a blanket. to A, this was Real. this was the Story and the Baby that i had told her about. her reverence and wonderment is a poignant reminder to me to remember why we celebrate this day. it's not about the presents, the cookies, the decorations, or our tree. and of course, i already knew that. but it can be so easy to become caught up in the busyness and hustle and focused on our to-do-list. we forget that Christmas is just half the story. Jesus came to die for our sins, to go from being Immanuel in the manger, to being our Savior on Easter morning. when i see the pure, unadulterated joy and amazement on A's face, i remember what Jesus said: "let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

both little girls continue to play with our nativities, and i pray that as all the children grow, they will not only love the Baby in the manger, but know and serve the Savior on the cross.

giving them a firm foundation

    this morning Dave and i stood in front of our church family, and pledged to raise baby B to love, honor and serve Jesus Christ- with her whole heart, soul and mind. Dave was asked to say a few words about B, and what he said was very touching and quite moving. i was weepy, needing to wipe my tears on the hem of B's dress.

    our house was built in the early 1800's, and is still standing firm today. that's because in the basement is a stone wall, the foundation upon which our home was built. the stonework is amazing to look at- solid and linear, supporting the main house for over 200 years now.

    however, the "new" addition was built some 80 years later, and the foundation was very poorly constructed. this foundation consisted of beams merely laid on the ground, supported only by rocks. in the course of the last 100+ years, the beams have been rotting away, and the kitchen and mudroom were slowly falling off the main house and rotting into the ground. it literally took all summer for Dave and the boys to jack up the whole addition, replace all the joists, and lay a new foundation.

    Dave used the contrast between these two foundations to illustrate the job that we are trying to do as parents: raise our children with a firm foundation. above all, we want all our sons and daughters to grow to love God, and serve Him with their whole heart and life. everything else does not matter. we work hard for 18 years or so to give them a solid foundation, and then our job is over. it's up to them to build their house.

    as i stood next to Dave holding my baby B, i was all teary and emotional. i realized, once again, how thankful i am for my husband. he is such a wonderful father to all the children. when he's asked how many children he has, the definitive answer is "6!" there are no qualifications, explanations or descriptions. that is a rare blessing, one for which i am truly thankful.

those little rascals!

a few weeks ago, i made a list of positive things that i appreciated about my teenagers. here's another one to add:

#12- they don't pull all tissues out of the box the minute you turn your back!

there has to be an up side!

if you're one of my friends or relatives that i talk to on a regular basis, you probably have noticed that i sometimes spend time
whining and pulling my hair outtalking about my frustration with my teenagers- specifically the male ones. if you're one of those people- thanks for listening! you probably helped me not go insane for one more day. no, really, i love all my children fiercely, and today i would like to spend time making a list and sharing it with you about some of the things i appreciate about being a mother to 4 teenagers:

#1- they are potty trained

#2- they don't eat cat food

#3- they sleep through the night

#4- they don't scribble on every blessed piece of paper they can get their hands on

#5- they don't throw whole rolls of TP in the toilet

#6- they don't confuse a glue stick with chapstick

#7- they don't touch your beautiful, flowy, black with purple flowers Sunday skirt, and say "ooo. mommy. curtain."

#8- they don't chew the corners off all the board books

#9- they don't eat copious amounts of raisins from little red boxes

#10- they don't find old, dusty, cracked binkys hiding under the furniture and pop it in for "old time's sake"

#11- they don't hold a calculator up to their ear and say "hello?hello?"

and that's all i have to say about that!

a chapter in our lives is ending. sniff...sniff...

today was a very special day. it was the first day all summer that we were all 8 together, and we celebrated by going to our local state park for hiking and swimming. unfortunately, it was also our last day all 8 together- tommorow M leaves for college. all the way down in south Carolina. that is very far away from Pennsylvania. but i wont' think about that now. i'll tell you about our very special day.

first, we had a special breakfast- i made PW's sleepin' in omelet. i thought that it was pretty good- but maybe next time i won't use the onion rolls. then we had a friend come over to do a family picture for us, as the last time we did that, i was in the hospital (still with my IV's in) after having B. she was only a few hours old.

then we were finally ready to take off- after packing a small mountain of stuff, preparing for every possible scenario and contingency. even though we were only going for a few hours. traveling with small children is like that. we went to rickett's glen state park ,and were able to do some hiking to see the beautiful waterfalls, and then spend a relaxing afternoon on the beach, playing and picnicking. we all took turns playing with the little ones, and even were able to have a short snooze!

it was important to me to do this today. it's our "last day" home as a family. i know that M will be home again, but it will never be the same. she is growing into a beautiful young lady, and when she comes home at thanksgiving, she will be a different person. today was a nice gift.

here we are at the trail head, ready to start down to see the waterfalls.

A has found a stick, and is enjoying her ride on dada's shoulders.

this is the largest waterfall, with a bridal veil drop of 94'. a fellow hiker was kind enough to take this picture for us. and i'm very happy with how well it turned out! we'll put this one in our hallway gallery.

M hiked down (and back) with B on her back. B loves to be outside, and look around.

the boys were busy being boys- climbing on all the rocks and fallen tree trunks.

A is ready to head for the beach. here she has her stuff, and is running for the water.

N took B down so she could dabble her feet in the water. she loved it, and ended up crawling all over in the shallow water. she only drank a little water, and ate a little bit of sand!

this is A after she took a sip of dada's mountain dew! how could i scold a cute little face like that?

M brought her knitting. smart thinking. but she forgot her shorts and swim suit. go figure!

and before we headed home, A took B for a little stroll. they both seemed to like it!

after we got home, M started packing the van with all her stuff. she's really excited to go, and can't wait to get started. i can't believe that she's old enough (already!)to go to college. just yesterday she was my little baby girl. I've been thinking back over the last 19+ years, and wishing that i could do some parts over. i was such a young mother! i would yell less and hug more. i would read more stories, and play more games. i would talk less and listen more. i would marvel more at this beautiful young child that was a gift from God. but the best part is that M turned out so well- in spite of all my flaws and shortcomings! and she is a beautiful young lady- I'm proud that she is my daughter. i think she will be homesick, and already I'm counting the days until all my children are home under the same roof again. until then, we'll be here ready to listen and encourage from afar. and going through tons of Kleenex. maybe I'll buy stock in Kimberly-Clark.

it's nice to know that i'm appreciated, by golly!

last night i decided to go for a bike ride. it had been one of those crazy, wild and hairy days, and i just needed to get out for a bit. after i put the girls down to bed, one of my sons was gracious enough to let me borrow his bike, and 2 sons helped get the seat adjusted. i did my best to ignore their incredulous questionings asking if i even remembered how to ride a bike, and did i know how to use the brakes? so off i go, just a tiny bit wobbly, and i hear them saying behind me- "be careful, it's a busy road." and "come home before dark." I'm feeling just a little less frazzled and comforted to hear their concerned send off, when i hear one of them say to the other- "yeah, if she gets hurt, who will cook for us?"

like i said- it's nice to know I'm appreciated!

sunday musings

the job of being a parent is intimidating, and can be downright terrifying. to think that we've been given these many children to teach, and only have the brief 18 year span to do so, is enough to make the bravest heart quiver. i think it's at the heart of every mother, and is certainly in my heart, that we want to raise Godly, moral, honest and productive members of society. maybe a few other adjectives as well, but those will do for now. if i, as an imperfect mother, can raise children who are any of those things, it's only by God's grace, mercy and divine intervention. i want my children to be better than me, and to learn some of the lessons that I missed along the way.

through much of my adult life, i have always struggled with having a daily quiet time, and regular prayer- laying my heart before God, and talking to Him. this year i wanted to get control of this particular issue, and on December 31, i declared this The Year In Which Our Whole Family Would Read The Bible The Whole Way Through. even though i started off with noble intentions, i fell behind quicker than i could ever have imagined. my life is so busy, and a daily quiet time was not a discipline that was ingrained in me as a child, and i would so easily forget that i was to be setting time aside for God every day.

but A inspires me. although she is barely 2, she loves Jesus with all her heart. A has begun to master 1 Thessalonians 5:17 "Pray without ceasing." we can be reading, weeding, building blocks or rocking for bedtime, and she will take my hand and say "pray?" she wants to talk to Jesus! i will pray with her, and when we are done, she will get a big smile on her face and say "more?" if only i could have the heart of this small child who wants to talk to God about everything!

A reminds me that God is forgiving and mericful, even though that is not what i deserve. she reminds me that God is kind and loving, and cares about every part of my life, the life of my family, and the lives of my children. He loves my children even more than i do! that is why i want them to all have the habit of talking daily with God. i want them to have a personal relationship with Him. Personal, Steady, Daily. that is a discipline that i can impart to them, if they are willing to accept my teaching.

i don't try to be the Perfect Mother, but i sincerely desire to be a Good Mother. i resolve to try harder (again) to rely more on God, listening for His voice and seeking His guidance in my life. and anna will hold me to it.

yesterday the kids and i spent the day visiting relatives in Bethlehem. we don't have much family, so we could do the whirlwind tour in just one day. first we stopped to see my great aunts- Mary and Olive. if you think of the Baldwin sisters on the old TV show, The Waltons, you can have a pretty good picture of what they are like.

all my life i can remember the aunts being a part of our lives. there are many pictures of me and my mother spending holidays and other important milestones with them. we would often stop in for a visit, and i know that my mother always tried to keep in touch with them. in turn, i often take my own children down to see the aunts on special days, and since they have lived in their house for 71 years, the pictures all seem the same- just different clothes, new wallpaper, and the children in the picture get older: first my mother, then me, and finally my children.

i have made the trip down to see the aunts after each of the children were born, to show them my newest baby. this Christmas M and i took the girls down- it was going to be their first time seeing baby B. it was so reminiscent for me of the same trip that i had taken almost 20 years earlier, with my own mother, to show off my first baby- M. this will be a tradition that i hope we will be able to continue when M has her own children.

we also stopped to see another aunt, from the other side of the family- my aunt sandy. i could fairly say that she is my favorite aunt, and she has always been a loving and supportive figure in my life, even though we often drift apart in the busyness of raising 10 children between us.

i have never had the close family relationships that i so eagerly wanted, and at times desperately needed, but i am thankful for what i do have. i know that even though we are all busy with many things, there is always something grounding about visiting blood relatives, and feeling that attachment with them. someone that you knew you when you were a little kid, and can say "do you remember that time when you were visiting at our house, and ate the artificial apple from our fruit bowl?" or, "remember when i offered you a lick of my ice cream cone, and you ate a whole scoop?"

we all long to be close to people, and feel loved- it is a God given need in all human beings. as my children grow, and as some are preparing to leave our home, i am strongly reminded that I am the anchor of the boat that is My Family. it is me that builds traditions, and cements the life-long relationships that will foster that sense of connectedness. It will be my job to provide the home atmosphere that encourages the returning of the children, and staying involved in their lives.

this can and will be a large and daunting task, and even terrifying at times, but with God's help, i pray that i am up to the challenge. above all, i want to be a Good Mother.

Aunt Olive and Mary with the 2 little girls.

building character- one son at a time

one of the projects that i have for the boys this summer is to refinish some furniture for me. it's all part of the master scheme to teach them responsibility, the value of hard work, and respect for other's property. this stems from the fact that there is a shocking amount of furniture in my house that is carved on, painted on or written on- or a combination of all three. they each have a piece of furniture that they will be restoring to its former glory. D is working on stripping the high chair. he started on Monday morning, and it's coming along nicely, and will hopefully be done with it tomorrow.

this is what it looked like before he started working on it- painted white. we found it along the curb in lewisburg one Friday afternoon while doing papers. we brought it home and A, and now B, has been using it ever since.

now he has it stripped, and is working on scraping off the last of the paint. we will coat it with a clear coat of butcher's wax, which will really bring out the grain in the maple and oak.

i think i can speak for all the boys- if hard work builds character, then by the end of the summer they should be dripping with the stuff! and that's what it's all about!